George Lucas is rumoured to want to make another new Star Wars movie.

Last decade, Lucas made claims he wanted to make six more films, three prequel Star Wars movies about Darth Vader (potatohead) and three sequel Star Wars movies about Luke Skywalker (lightsaber).

But then, when he released the Phantom Menace and everyone realised that is was the rubbishest film of all time, he changed his mind, and told the world that he was only going to make the prequels.

Then Attack Of The Clones came out, and people still thought it was pants. And George deepened his resolution. He'd make one more Star Wars (DVDs) film, and that was it.

That "one more Star Wars film" turned out to be Revenge Of The Sith, which is making more money every second than you will ever see in your miserable lives. The sound of cash registers has wafted over into the ears of George Lucas and, surprise surprise, he's rumoured to be considering making another one.

Thankfully, and if the reports are true, the new movie won't be about Luke Skywalker and Han Solo. That would just be two hours of them both going "Wow, we're brilliant, aren't we? We defeated the evil emperor and everything!" with nothing for them to do. They've already beat the two most evil beings in the universe - what would be left for them to do? The film would have to be called something like Star Wars: Episode VII - Luke Eats A Nice Biscuit.

Instead, the new film is likely to be set 100 years before The Phantom Menace, and will feature Yoda as the hero among an all-new cast. Who'd have thought that a green Muppet with Fozzie Bear's voice would go on to be such an icon? There are said to be no firm plans right now about a plot, but Yoda will be 100 years younger, so really he should be bombing around picking up chicks in a red sports car.

We're going to ignore the huge titling problem that the new film will cause, by the way. Will it be called Episode 0? Or will it be named Episode I, and all the existing films will have to scootch up an episode?

Best news of all, if this film actually gets made, is that George Lucas will try to take a back seat in the production of the movie. So it might actually be a subtle, witty script directed in an imaginative way. For once.

Related stories:

Ten Things We've Learnt From Star Wars

George Lucas: "Two Types Of Star Wars Fan" 

[story by Stuart Heritage]

If you do a little fact-checking on this story, you'll find that Lucas has "announced" nothing of the kind. The entire string of headlines about the supposedly new sequel was generated by a report of a drunken conversation on the beach with Lucas by some dude on his honeymoon -- I'm not kidding -- on somebody's blog.

Posted by: Steve Silberman at 27 May 2005 15:37:15

---

Many thanks Steve - headline amended.

Cheers,

hs

Posted by: hecklerspray at 27 May 2005 18:00:04

---

I dont know.

Posted by: gutzy granny at 29 May 2005 00:40:18

---

Now that it is almost over, there is now a new website thanking George Lucas for 28 years of Star Wars to present 1,000,000 signatures and stories to him later this summer. Look at http://www.thankyougoerge.com

Posted by: Ken Collins at 3 Jun 2005 04:49:08

---

actually i would rather them continue the story after "return of the jedi" showing how luke starts the new jedi acadamy and how leia and han have their three children and luke gets married to mara jade

Posted by: Kempfer at 2 Dec 2005 22:29:38

---