1990's horrorshow The Spice Girls (CDs) are planning to reform in 2006 for a 10th anniversary get-together which, according to various insider reports, could leave each member with a staggering £10 million bank bonus.

hecklerspray can't quite decide what's more disturbing. The fact that it's almost been a whole decade since those warbling fools first 'burst' onto the music scene, or the fact that there are actually people out there who still consider this to be a good idea.

Frizzy-haired Mel B (CDs) let the news slip while making a bleary-eyed GMTV appearance. "I think so, but that's just me," she said, responding to a question about reunion rumours. The nightmare is all scheduled to kick off, she added, "hopefully next year, if we can get everything sorted and together."

The scary thing? This isn't just the desperate straw-clutching of a has-been, clinging to insane dreams of former glory. Scary has already spoken to Baby (CDs) and Sporty (CDs) - "they have been to visit me" - and is expecting to have dinner with the emaciated Mrs. Beckham (CDs) and the fat ginger foghorn very soon.

"They are considering playing at the new Wembley Stadium next year", an industry insider frothed. "It would be a dream venue and there's no doubt they would pack it out." hecklerspray has to say that this is a somewhat optimistic prediction. Wasn't the entire Spice Girls fanbase made up of four-year-old girls? Won't they have all graduated to something a little more teenage by now. You know, like getting or happy-slapping?

A word of advice, though, girls. If this does all go ahead, those names are going to have to change?

Baby Spice? More like Eerily-Childlike Spice.

Posh Spice? Chav Spice is surely a more fitting replacement.

Ginger Spice? Bottle-Dye Spice.

Sporty Spice? Gym-Card-Expired Spice.

Scary Spice? Actually, no ... that's just fine.

And as for Geri Halliwell's (CDs) thoughts on the matter? Erm ... she hasn't given any. She's far too busy waffling about how she has beaten those nasty depression demons and emerged "bursting with self-confidence."

"I feel like the rabbit on the Cadbury's Caramel advert, you know, 'Caaaaaaadbury’s Caaaaaaaramel,' she moans until you feel she's going to melt all over the banquette," Geri explained. "I feel I've only just developed into a woman and I like it."

Christ.

[story by C J Davies]

i think ay stupid...

Posted by: chad at 23 May 2005 18:32:13

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i think it would be amazing 2 see them together just for one night and her melanie blast them aswy with that amazing voice. they are great and still are and always wil be

Posted by: kelly at 24 May 2005 14:35:32

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They should definitely do it, it is surprising how many fans they all still have as a group and it's a shame people don't remember them for their massive success! They sold approximately 40 million albums in 4 years!

Posted by: Mark at 24 May 2005 18:54:19

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The thing is, none of them could sing in the first place. Since the split of the group what have they done? Erm nothing... because they were crap in the first place! C ya

Posted by: Claire at 25 May 2005 16:24:59

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Oh come on, they'd put the crows out of business! They are all chavs. Maybe Scary Spice wnats a reunion because she's skint! Sorry but they couldn't see to save themselves!

Posted by: Kathryn at 25 May 2005 16:35:14

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I knew this would happen one day & now its really happening.Isn't it wonderful?
Actually the thing is that, the "SPICE GIRLS" do deserve a COMEBACK coz we(fans) never got enough of them.
I'm sooooo happy 'bout the "SPICE GIRLS" reunion personally & my spirits r soaring very high indeed when i first caught up wit the news. That means gr8 music & fabulous vdo's r coming up for the fans.
I wish all the "SPICE GIRLS" GOOD LUCK & 1 thing is that they should swear that they'll NEVER EVER split up again no matter what.

I request & plead all the fans 2 provide their entire support 2 the "spice girls" as b4.

C Ya.

Cheers.............Kaladhar.

Posted by: Kaladhar at 26 May 2005 17:10:13

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YAY SPICE GIRLS ARE COMING BACK!!
Sure they have chavs, and are kinda weird and fake. But hey there my childhood. Plus there music actually lifted people's spirits up..most of the time.

xx

Posted by: Tash at 17 Jan 2006 19:00:31

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